Authentic self-love and self-worth are key parts of your confidence and determine how you show up as you progress through your life, navigate uncertainty, accept success or failure, and recover from personal and professional challenges.
It may be that the tips provided in this blog post may be familiar to you and you may already be practicing some of them to boost your confidence. Or, if you are like me, then you may have forgotten to implement some of them, or even resisted or never committed fully to a consistent practice of these simple tasks.
The checklist in this blog post to help boost your confidence will help you identify tasks that may not be happening on a daily basis in your life. Yes, it is true some of these may seem to be very simple but many times, I have found that when I am not grounded or feeling overwhelmed by events in my life and world, a timely reminder helps me reset.
I hope that this checklist will help you boost your confidence quickly and consistently so that showing up confident becomes a daily practice that is effortless and enjoyable for you.
1. Get Prepared for Your Day
Always, but always, prepare for a phone call, event, or anything that’s coming up next for you.
Winging it will only work sometimes, and many times, especially for important things, you may fail at what you are trying to accomplish. For me, I have found it to be true that when I have prepared for these things, I feel more confident when applying myself to the task at hand.
Think about how you prepared and studied for tests when you were in school and remember that feeling of confidence when you felt you had the answers because you were prepared.
Here are some tools that help you prepare for success
Visualize your success by thinking about the outcome for the meeting, call, or event.
Role play with a friend, record yourself on video and play it back, or get your notes together and practice in front of the mirror.
Research and read. It is very easy to find information about a topic or an individual online. By spending some time exploring someone’s professional profile online, you will be able to create a connection quickly during your meeting.
Know your stuff. Know what you want, what is a deal breaker, and have clarity of purpose.
A truism to keep in mind: Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.
2. Get Moving Physically Everyday
Did you know that the American Medical Association has deemed sitting linked to higher rates of death from all causes? You can boost your confidence by committing to some type of exercise every single day.
For every hour and half you spend at your desk, the recommendation is to get out of the house and spend three to four times per week an equal amount of time moving your body on the yoga mat, on the hiking trail, running, biking, at the gym, rowing in a kayak, or on a paddle board.
Just do something that brings you joy, without a phone or computer attached to it. (Zoom Yoga is good if you have limited options.)
Schedule these MOVING sessions in your appointment book and dress for each one with whatever inspires you to feel your good mood, come out.. 99.9% of feeling good, is your attitude.
Bring it ON! Say to yourself and the world, HERE I AM World!
3. Groom Yourself and Dress Appropriately
I know the pandemic has meant for many to dress casually and sometimes even show up for online meetings right out of bed. However, studies have shown that personally grooming and dressing up nicely or appropriately (for some, it could mean a clean shirt and jeans, and for others it could mean a more formal outfit) has two benefits: a) it creates a positive impression on others, and b) you also think more positively about yourself.
You can think about it in another way: showing up appropriately dressed and groomed indicates your respect for yourself and others you are meeting.
I do understand grooming and dressing nicely doesn’t mean the same thing for every individual, but when you are cleaned up and presentable, your whole energy shifts to the “Bring it On. I am Here World” attitude. And, everyone you see will feel that!
I truly believe that showing up groomed and dressed nicely or appropriately helps boost your confidence.
4. Continue Learning and Educating Yourself
Read, Listen, Watch and Attend events where you will learn something new and keep you motivated towards feeling good physically and mentally.
Open your heart and mind to suspend disbelief and embark on a growth mindset.
Nourishing ourselves with healthy thoughts (and food) are equally important! This will boost your confidence levels and increase your confidence in your making the right choices day to day, moment to moment.
5. Clear Your Physical Space
Less clutter in your physical space is an energetic action that creates way less clutter in your mind.
Set aside time to clear out clothes that you no longer use and tchotchkes (bits and pieces you don’t use); these can be donated to a charity shop so that others can benefit from what you cannot use.
More practical suggestions include re-organizing a junk drawer, donating books you no longer want to read, letting go of old personal hygiene cleaning products…A friend has the following rule: if she buys a new piece of clothing, she moves one piece of clothing from her wardrobe to her donation pile. This means her closet is always manageable and not stuffed with clothes that she no longer can fit into or use.
Decluttering is another key to feeling clear minded, confident and calm.
6. Practice Gratitude and Self Acknowledged LOVE
We live in a world where we are overly connected to devices, which can get in the way of simply feeling grateful for the good things that are happening to us, or to others close to us. Research shows that practicing gratitude can help you be happier, which in turn can help boost your confidence.
I strongly recommend that sensing and feeling gratitude become daily practice. If you do not already have a gratitude journal, we have an Awareness Journaling Workbook in our Free Tools section that you can download.
You could also simply talk to a close friend or family member about your gratitude; however, it would be good to do it daily. Once you establish this practice, you will begin to see more things show up in your life to be grateful for and begin to feel the love you feel for yourself and others expanding.
Mastering your mindset is a powerful tool and it can lead you confidently to boosting your confidence and Self LOVE.
Muriel Murphy is a Lifestyle, Health and Wellness Coach, a Yoga Educator/Functional Movement Specialist, and an Advanced Bodywork/Massage Practitioner. She sincerely believes the lineage of all healing arts is a gift of health and wellbeing for anyone who chooses to take the journey within. Muriel is an E-RYT 500 Yoga Educator (Yoga Alliance), MMS NorCal Certificated Coach, and a member of the MMS NorCal Coaching Collective.
Today, I want to talk about finding inner peace in a turbulent world.
Peace starts within.
Peace is who we are, who we choose to be.
Peace flows outwards to carry a ripple effect into this turbulent world.
When you yourself are at peace, there is also a little peace in the world. When we share that peace with others, we spread even a little more peace in the world. World peace is then a reflection of our own inner state.
The crisis in Ukraine is heartbreaking. It is sending energetic shock waves of grievance, immense sadness, depression, fear, anger, rage, anxiety, and hopelessness. This on top of the recent events in Afghanistan and the already constant global threats such as climate change and the ongoing pandemic. Most of us want to act in some way but may become paralyzed and stuck with thoughts of what to do. We may feel shame as we go back to succumbing to our daily lives not knowing what kind of action to take or what to do with our multitude of overwhelming feelings.
Finding peace in a turbulent world can be achieved with consciousness, practice, and intent and I am so glad to share techniques that have worked for me and others in my coaching practice.
Peace Starts with Us
We might be wondering what we can do to shift any given situation being far away, feeling a lack of power or being a mere individual? As the wave of fear, outrage and anxiety grows bigger around the world, how can we swim against this tide? How do we find peace when inside an anxiousness grows?
The answer is peace starts with us.
It is created from within, expands our own physical sphere and ignites a ripple effect into our homes, our communities and ultimately around the world. It is not some external force or factor which we seek, find, and then collect. Rather it is a spiritual bank account which we fill by putting deposits into our own hearts, and then spending freely with ourselves and those around us as the account is limitless.
Finding Peace is Being at Peace. While there are many things over which we have little control, we always have control over our response, attitude, and approach.
What are ways to access your peace and create space between stimulus and chosen response? Breathe, Connect, BE.
Our breath is always readily with us. When we bring our awareness to our breath and slow our breathing, our pituitary gland releases balancing hormones such as melatonin and serotonin. This has an immediate calming effect into our nervous system allowing us to step out of states of anxiousness and into a more focused and present center.
By taking a pause, a step back, we shift our internal, energetic state and move into chosen response to a given situation instead of the external event coming to hijack our emotion. Creativity, focus and problem-solving increase, allowing us to access our higher, essential being.
Three breathing techniques I find very useful are 1. The sigh, 2. Analomvilom (alternate nose breathing) and 3. Balloon breathing, described below.
1. Sigh Breathing Technique
Take a deep breath in through the nose and make an audible exhale through the mouth. The exhale is an immediate release of tension that the body holds. Visualize any other thought that no longer serves you and release it into the universe with your exhale.
2. Analomvilom Breathing Technique
Alternate nose breathing is a pranayama technique, whose yogic philosophy believes that the right side represents the sun and the left side the moon. To active the calming and cooling effect of the moon, hold your right nostril closed first and inhale through left, hold your breath and then exhale through the right.
Continue alternating as such. You can choose a certain count for the inhale and holding of the breath with a longer count on the exhale, for example a count of 6-6-7. Allow your focus to follow your breath and alternate like this for 1-5 min. End your breathing cycle with an exhale on the left.
3. Balloon Breathing Technique
Balloon breathing consists of inhaling and exhaling through the nose, allowing your stomach to fill and completely expand on the inhale while pushing the navel all the way towards the spine on the exhale. It’s inflating and deflating your stomach like a balloon. Again, it is useful to have the exhale 1-2 counts longer than the inhale.
Follow the rhythm of your breath like the tides of the ocean, invigorating, nourishing, cleansing. Take them as little love notes to yourself, feeding your life battery.
Connect
Too often we live in our heads, forgetting we are tied to our hearts and the rest of our body which holds infinite amounts of wisdom. Our hearts and bodies are powerful, inner GPS systems aiming to guide us in the right direction and to an optimum state of being. In our busy and modern lives, we tend not to hear nor listen to the signals we receive.
Pay Attention to How You Feel
The first step to tapping into our own connection is to pay attention to how we feel.
Ask yourself: How am I feeling? By identifying and acknowledging the way you feel, you also gain access to how you want to respond.
If there is a less desired feeling of sadness or hopelessness, allow yourself to be with this and ask yourself ‘What is this trying to tell me?’
What other part of myself do I want to call forth to address these feelings with?’
Allow your thoughts to melt down from your head and rest into your heart, ask your heart what it needs. It may be a simple breath, a little self-care like a cup of tea, a walk out in nature, calling a supportive friend or family member.
Allowing ourselves to be with our feelings instead of trying to push them away, also allows more access to the entirety of who we are and to experience life with more meaning. Start keeping track and raise your awareness about what feels good and what does not. What feeds your life battery? What drains it? Add more life feeding experiences to your daily routine. It could be something small like lighting a candle in the morning as you make your cup of coffee or bigger like being around more people that uplift you. Let that renewed energy flow out into the world.
Feelings also act as a messenger, a clue giver, that something is important to us. With this knowledge we can be curious about what types of action we can take to address the message and influence change. And, this becomes another step towards finding peace in a turbulent world.
Connect to Nature
A second powerful step to connect, is to connect to nature. The earth literally is grounding for us. We came from the Earth, are part of the Earth, and it is the reason we feel so calm and at ‘home’ in nature.
Nature is also awe inspiring, working in perfect harmony with one another, at its own pace, not judging or rushing, reminding us that we can trust the process of ourselves and radiate our own inner peace out.
Connecting to nature can be taking a long walk outside, or simply shifting our perspective to a tree outside a window or a plant in an office.
Pause, take notice and observe.
We are all connected on this earth, through space and energy.
Connect to the natural force around you, and let this calming radiate back out through you as you interact with yourself and others.
BE Peace to Achieve Inner Peace
BE the person you wish to mirror in the world.
Use your words and actions to relay your values. Take time to nourish you, so you in turn can give the best of yourself to others. Our heart centers are abundant in love and kindness. Choose love and kindness towards yourself, and let that be the foundation of all your interactions with others.
Our hearts are bold, vulnerable, humble, courageous, fierce, knowing, loving and strong.
When faced with an external circumstance that is disheartening to us, ask yourself ‘What is the opportunity here?’
Is the opportunity to be more kind, more giving, more understanding, more vocal, more educated, more connected from and within myself?
One of my favorite tools for BEING, is Stephen Covey’s – Circles of Influence over Circles of Concern. When faced with challenges or a crisis like the war in Ukraine, we need to ask ourselves how we can increase our own circle of Influence, meaning how we can affect change right here, right now in our own being, families, and communities.
With this proactive outlook, we realize we have tremendous influence to affect positive change. We are far more powerful than we can imagine. Whether being in service to someone today with random acts of kindness or by making small monetary donations to any number of charities taking large action. It is the sum of small acts and giving, energetically or other, that amount to a grand whole, creating massive impact.
Send a Ripple Effect of Peace Unto the Turbulent World
Perhaps, it is less about finding peace, but rather creating peace from inside out, to send a massive ripple effect unto a turbulent world. Perhaps, it is turning overwhelm into opportunity. An opportunity to rise to our higher, authentic selves. An opportunity to affect positive change in our own surroundings, starting now.
By stepping into our own best version, we are better able to meet the challenges of today, leading the way with peace from within.
Choose Being Peace Today and Ignite the Ripple Effect in a Turbulent World.
You can also speed up your journey to inner peace with a life or professional coach; they can help you uncover feelings, emotions, and discover your path to inner peace!
Michelle Mueller Ihrig is an Operations Leader, a Professional and Teams Coach, Consultant and Facilitator. Her philosophy of Leadership with Heart empowers leaders to embrace authenticity and connectivity to create stronger impact. Michelle’s Executive Wellness Coaching program is based on NLP (neuro linguistic programming) for growth mindsets and perspective shifts, Breatheology, and Mindfulness practices.
In part 2 of this two-part series on how Less is More, we continue the sharing from the MMS NorCal coaches on how having and doing less led them to realize much much more. For part 1 of this two-part series visit: Five Ways Less is More (Part 1).
In this article, the MMSNorCal coaches discuss benefits of learning to say no, whittling down obligations (work and personal), becoming less distracted, and focusing on being versus doing.
3. Fewer Obligations, More Time
Whether it is work obligations, family obligations, social obligations or pressure to perform that we put on ourselves, we often find ourselves working long hours or spending a lot of time because of what other people want us to do or because of what we feel we should do.
Learn to Say No
A key part of Less is More is to acquire the skill of saying no.
Coach Michelle Mueller Ihrig says that saying No “does not mean I am not interested, nor does it mean that the project is not worthwhile. No simply means, No – not now. There are so many interesting and important causes to be involved in and so many of our own family and personal needs. In order to actually make a meaningful impact, we need to learn to say No so we can say Yes! to what is most important now.”
Coach Ihrig finds that saying No makes room for Yes. She finds that It helps her to take time to list her top priorities in life right now, while keeping future goals in mind, it is essential to deciding what to say Yes to and when to say No. She believes that keepng a list of what to focus on now, and let the rest go for a later time.
Make room for the present and relish the feeling of freedom, clarity and space that ensues.
Coach Michelle Mueller Ihrig
Workaholism is Not the Solution
“I used to be a major workaholic”, says Coach Carla Morton. “And, when I worked out, I’d go HARD. For years people told me to slow down but it wasn’t until I got Mono a few years ago and I wasn’t able to work more than 4 hours a day and my work-outs were reduced to slow flat walks, that I learned how wonderful it is to take life a little easier. I was so attached to being seen as the best at everything and I now realize it was entirely ego driven. Who was I doing this for? Even when I slowed down and didn’t work like crazy, I was still respected. And when I stopped working out like a crazy person, I realized I was still the same person, and didn’t need to endure so much exhaustion and muscle fatigue to feel healthy.”
Coach Charles Vivier too was consumed with the rat race, putting all his time and energy climbing the corporate ladder. “I was very competitive and constantly comparing myself with others. It was only after I suffered some setbacks, that I realized what I had given up, what I had lost, what was really important to me and how I wanted to spend my time.”
“When I started a new position with a new organization, I was so consumed by external expectations, within a few months I found myself extremely exhausted” shared Coach Ihrig. “I asked myself – what is happening? Why am I feeling burnt out already? I took time to pause and reflect. The answer was that I was not being true to myself. I was putting my focus on ‘outward in’ – what people thought – instead of ‘inside out’ – what I needed to get done. By shedding the weight of external expectation and listening not just to my head, but also to my heart, less is more – I worked less, and got more done.”
Whittle Down Work Obligations
Coach Brandi Richard Thompson says she is better able to whittle work down to a few obligations when she is clear on her priorities. “We often take on a lot of tasks, many of them unnecessary, when we are not sure about what we should be doing right now. But when you are clear, it is not only easier to say no but easier to justify it to yourself.”
Coach Ihrig finds that anything unfinished, unused, unresolved, or disorganized takes space in our physical, mental and emotional capacity robbing us of vital mental and physical energy to create the life we seek.
What a Pause can do for You
More tips from Coach Ihrig who was in a huge transition in 2021. She found herself with heightened levels of anxiety and distraction because she had a very long list of things she wanted to accomplish. When she reached out to one of her mentors, the mentor simply said:
Stop. Stop trying to create anything new. Stop building. Stop planning. Pause for 3 days and tie up loose ends.
Get your calendar in order, clean your house, file your paperwork, do your banking, make time for your daily wellbeing, reach out to neglected yet important relationships.’
Coach Ihrig says that it was a powerful lesson for her that sometimes we need to pause, or even take a big step down, in order to gain the strength, focus and momentum to then take one or two steps forward.
4. Less Distractions, More Clarity
As we have mentioned on this blog before we are surrounded by distractions that are all clamoring for our time and attention. Here are three questions to ask yourself if you find yourself overwhelmed with the lack of time to accomplish what you need to do.
How much time do you spend glued to the TV, scrolling through social media, gossiping about movie stars, or drinking endless cups of coffee?
How much time do you spend looking for your keys or searching through your files or in making new lists and endless planning?
What much time do you spend multitasking — getting interrupted with calls, texts and chat messages – and then remembering what you were working on and re-focusing?
Priortizing Access to News
Yes, it is true that some information, such as global, national and local news, is essential to remain engaged as citizens. Many of us want to stay up-to-date, but may also find it difficult to limit our consumption.
Coach Sarah E. Spencer points out that smart phones provide unrivaled access to information, and unchecked, one can find oneself doom scrolling through negativity, with no ability to control or influence. She is intentional about when she checks the news, for example – in the morning after her wake up routine, mid-day after lunch and a quick look before dinner.
Since many online, radio and television media outlets repeat the same news, Coach Sarah prioritizes reading and skips similar articles.
Reduce Social Media Distractions
“Our time and attention is easily stolen from us through distractions like frequently checking to see how many likes your post has had on social media”, says Coach Michelle Hayden-Marsan. “For me, less screen time means more real life experience and less chattering and monkeymind leads to more powerful insights and creativity. It isn’t easy to change habits which don’t serve us, but how we spend our time is a choice and choosing to do the things that bring us joy is well worth the effort.”
Coach Hayden-Marsan, aspires to keep the chattering self-talk in her mind (which is usually judging, labeling, worrying, or making lists) to as dull a roar as possible. She finds that the less she obsesses unconsciously, the more space there is for her to notice things, to be present and happy in the moment and to hear the wisdom of the intuitive voice within that steers her in the right direction.
She continues: “The first step is to notice when the chattering starts. Once I notice it, I can label it: listing, judging, obsessing, worrying…I already know that none of those thought patterns serve me, so I just drop them and come back to what I’m doing, as opposed to what I’m thinking.”
Check your Unconscious Bias
“It’s amazing how often we make judgements about people and how much we don’t realize it”, says Coach Hayden-Marsan. “Unconscious bias is such a big issue, especially with the advent of social media, where we actually can see how prevalent our biases are and how they can manifest in horrible behaviors.
When we learn the ways in which we are unconsciously judging others, we can begin to make the effort to start recognizing people for who they really are, not who we assume them to be.
Less distraction from unconscious chatter, quiets the mind and creates clarity to see people from the inside out – for who they really are, rather than who we assume them to be.
5. Less Doing, More Being
“This can be a tough one, for various reasons; specifically since we are conditioned to achieve more, work harder, climb the ladder of success”, says Coach Marsan. “But we can still have a strong work ethic and also understand the value of enjoying time to replenish our spirit by being present, whether noticing the sunset, meditating, sitting in the backyard and watching the children playing, or the interactions of the birds at the feeder…Taking time to cultivate Being still brings peace and creates much needed space in our head to just “Be”. There is so much growth that comes from that space, and we don’t experience it without cultivating it.”
“When we don’t value being, it is often because we place higher value on doing. This is problematic when we encounter circumstances when we cannot do and maybe even need to ask for help. It is in those moments that we exercise being okay with being ourselves and being the recipient of the doing of others.” Coach Brandi Richard Thompson.
Finally, ask yourself:
What do you want to achieve?
What more will you get with less?
If you continue to feel overwhelmed and distracted, consider working with a professional coach. A coach can help you examine your life, discover your passion and explore how having less and doing less can free up space for more of what you truly want.
Brandi Richard Thompson is a transformational growth strategist, award winning leader, wellness expert and life coach committed to changing the trajectory of the world one person at a time. She specializes in coaching black women, women of color, and those who lead them. As founder of the Operation Growth Institute, a global transformational learning center, Brandi helps people accept, heal, grow, and transform into the next iteration of their personal and professional best. Brandi is known as the Operation Growth Coach.
Many of us grow up seeing and hearing and learning to seek more and more and we are not taught that Less can be More. As we move through our lives, we fill our homes, our bodies, our time, our lives with stuff, food, distractions, and unneeded angst. Believing or saying that Less is More is antithetical to consumerism culture that surrounds us; however, for many of us, the experiences of the last few years have given a radical jolt in our belief systems.
During the pandemic, many of us did not have to dress up for work, host big parties, go to the gym, commute to work or travel long distances; nor did our calendars get crammed with recreational activities and social obligations. We faced restrictions and limitations on what we acquired, where we went and who we spent time with and we asked ourselves, moving forward, what we really need and what we want our lives to be about.
As our MMSNorCal coaches also mulled over what they had and what they wanted and how they managed with less, they discovered that often, Less is More.
In part 1 of this two-part series on how Less is More, the coaches share their thoughts and observations on how having and doing less led them to realize much much more.
1. Less Clutter Equals More Space
Our homes are cluttered with clothes, bags, books, office supplies, plastic containers, empty bottles, bathroom products, cleaning supplies, old bedding, extra bath towels and much much more. Many times we put off getting rid of stuff because it can be overwhelming. In fact, many of us have to make a comitment to declutter. Or, we may need professional help. That’s the reason why NAPO– a U.S.-based association of professional organizers and productivity professionals, exists.
“This process of purging takes time for me and I find myself procrastinating because I don’t like things going into the landfill”, says Coach Muriel Murphy, “With so many people in need, I now fill brown paper grocery bags with useful items and take them to homeless and tent communities nearby, hoping they can help someone, instead of taking up space in a landfill.”
For Coach Lindsey Taylor-Vivier, “Climate change is something that inspires me everyday to make thoughtful decisions about everything like buying clothes, to what I put in my refrigerator. I used to be the person at the cash register who would add the items around me at the last moment. I don’t do that anymore. I am mindful when I make any purchases and ask “Do I need this? Is this a need or a want?” If I am at the grocery store I will buy the products that are local, not someplace far away that requires transportation on a ship, plane, train or truck. Being mindful makes me feel better and if we all make small changes, it will have an impact.”
Clutter isn’t just the stuff in your closet, it’s anything that gets between you and the life you want to be living.
Peter Walsh, Professional Organizer
Create Physical Space to Create Peace and Freedom
“I vividly remember as a teenager feeling an incredible sense of relief and satisfaction every time I cleaned my room,” says Coach Michelle Mueller Ihrig. “I would sleep better, I felt light and could breathe deeply and easily, and I felt inspired, accomplished and energized. Almost 40 years later, I often think back to that time because it still feels very much the same. It is incredible how this sense of awareness was already very much alive in me, even back then.”
Coach Mueller Ihrig now believes that by cleaning up the physical space around us, we also clean up the energetic space inside our head and hearts, leaving room for so much more peace, freedom and space to create a meaningful direction for our lives moving forward.
If you are having problems creating phyical space, ask yourself these questions:
What gets in your way?
What gets in your way in your physical space?
What gets in your way in your head and what gets in your way in your heart?”
Coach Brandi Richard Thompson believes that we can actually have less by being mindful between choosing and not choosing at all. She says, that “when we accept everything that comes our way, handme downs, giveaways from the conference we attended and more, we are not choosing. When we do this, we are accepting everything. Clearing clutter often begins with determining what really works for us and only accepting those items into our lives.”
2. Simpler Food Equates to Better Health
Coach Charles Vivier believes that many of us eat out of habit, we eat unconsciously, we eat to stuff ourselves when we feel empty or sad, we treat food as entertainment and as distraction from things we don’t want to do.
Instead, he says what we need to do instead is to eat mindfully, joyfully, savoring the flavors, feeling gratitude and treating food as energy.
Coach Lindsey finds that despite being passionate about food and having traveled all over the world, she now wants things to be simple, local, and delious. She has found herself making big changes in this department. She and Charles “like to rotate between a few options for breakfast, lunch is soup and salad and dinner is fish or chicken and a vegetable, unless we go out for ethnic foods that we can’t make at home. The simpler the better really.”
Indeed, even in food habits and what we consume, Less can be More.
Coach Mueller Ihrig’s mantra Basic is Best is the foundation of her wellbeing. At the beginning of the pandemic, life slowed down considerably for her as she was suddenly at home and her two-hour long daily commute disappeared. With this extra time, she chose to enroll in a Pranayama breathwork class along with some Ayurvedic consulting.
Her Ayurvedic consult taught her that “the more ingredients there are in anything, the more processed or complicated it appears, the more I know to leave it. By going back to basics, I was able to release the additional weight I had carried around and I was able to find focus and peace through my breath at the same time.”
Consistency and Routines can Help
Coach Muriel likes consistency and routines. She starts her day with a cup of green tea and then a cup of green juice fortified with vitamins and other tinctures. Next comes her daily yoga practice and then a superfood smoothie. Whole, unprocessed foods, simple menus and daily routines make for easier grocery shopping, streamlined menus, less stress, lower expenses and improved wellbeing.
What do you want to achieve?
What more will you get with less?
In the second part of this series, you will learn how to reduce distractions and obligations, and focus more on being!
You can also consider working with an MMSNorCal Life or Professional Coach to examine your life, discover your passion and explore how having less and doing less can free up space for more of what you truly want.
Brandi Richard Thompson is a transformational growth strategist, award winning leader, wellness expert and life coach committed to changing the trajectory of the world one person at a time. She specializes in coaching black women, women of color, and those who lead them. As founder of the Operation Growth Institute, a global transformational learning center, Brandi helps people accept, heal, grow, and transform into the next iteration of their personal and professional best. Brandi is known as the Operation Growth Coach.
Concluding this three-part series on surfing chaos in your life and the world with more collective wisdom from the MMSNorCal Collective professional and life coaches who share their own techniques to keep themselves centred, calm, and mindful.
In this final article, the coaches talk about how to embrace each new wave of chaos and disruption, how to build trust in yourself that you will survive and thrive; and, finally consider getting professional or life coaching to up your resilience.
As always, consider sharing with friends and family so they too can benefit from the teachings in contained in this series of articles.
Step 5. Breathe and Embrace Each New Wave
After we have fully done our part, we need to once again accept that we may not be in control of what happens next.
“I remind myself that nothing is permanent, like a wave, this time will pass and take everything with it, and each new wave will bring both joy and heartache. I believe in nature’s balance and when things are good, relish in them, and when times are hard, I know it won’t last AND I know that life doesn’t give you one without the other. Somehow, having that perspective has helped me survive some pretty hard things.” – Coach Lindsey Taylor-Vivier
“Tomorrow is another day, and you always can change, adapt, transform and get better.” – Coach Charles Vivier
“I acknowledge this difficult time and remind myself that others are challenged in ways that we may never know. So, kindness is important now. Letting go when someone is rude, or judgemental. We are all suffering, so I think of what small things I can do to make people feel heard and seen.” – Coach Michelle Hayden-Marsan
“Focusing on my breath reminds me that all the answers are within. In the midst of chaos, deep breathing brings us back to our center.” – Coach Brandi Richard Thompson
Breathe to Detoxify
As per Coach Michelle Mueller Ihrig, “To breathe is the body’s most natural ability to detoxify, calm and ground. With every exchange of our breath, we breathe in the life giving force of oxygen, and with every exhale we release carbon dioxide. This ebb and flow of our breath is our body’s natural way to stabilize and find its center.”
She uses pranayama (breath of life) techniques throughout her day to more quickly activate the state of being that allows her to increase the gap between stimulus and chosen response.
When we come from a more grounded state, we are better able to respond versus react to any given situation.
Coach Michelle Mueller Ihrig
Three Breathing Exercises
Coach Mueller Ihrig offers three of her favorite breathing methods which she use first thing in the morning and last thing at night.
Balloon Breathing.
Breath in and out of the nose and envisioning your stomach as a balloon, inhaling slowly and filling and expanding it with air, holding for just a second at the top of the inhale, and then slowly exhaling while pushing your navel all the way towards your spine.
Alternate Nose Breathing.
cCose your right nostril while breathing in through your left nostril first, then hold the left nostril closed while exhaling through the right, then inhale right and exhale left and so on. Breathe in for a count of 6 or 7 and exhale for a count of 7 or 8.
Deep Inhale and Hold.
Take a deep breath in and expand your stomach holding your breath for as long as is comfortable. While holding your breath, focus on listening – to your body, to your external surroundings. Awaken your senses, awaken your awareness. Ask yourself, what do I hear?
Step 6. Trust and have Faith All will be Well
Coach Charles believes in the power, energy of the universe which wants the best for itself.
He surrounds himself with people who care for humanity and the universe and want the best for themselves and others. “I am grateful everyday for my life and my choices, my loved one, my fortune”, he says. “Trust is an ongoing process. Trusting myself is an ongoing process as well as trusting others, starting with my loved ones and the Universe that we all are doing our best to live our best life.”
“My trust has come from a mantra that I love which says: “I grow through what I go through” says Coach Hayden-Marsan. “Any major difficulty that has brought me to my knees in the past has eventually paved the way to believing this too will pass. Sheer grit and determination has given me the tools to move forward and having done so, I know that I am never alone; even when I feel otherwise.”
Coach Brandi admits she doesn’t always do a great job. “When I am at my best, I remember that whatever is going on in the world or in the meeting, it’s really just about me and God. When life gets unbearable, my faith reminds me that no one or no thing can harm me without going through God first”, she says.
Steps on Building Faith
Coach Mueller Ihrig builds faith by practicing and embracing three things:
Counting her blessings
Adopting an attitude of gratitude
Building awareness and awe of the perfect ecosystem that is our natural world, which is so much larger than ourselves and works in complete harmony”
Trust is the foundation for any flourishing relationship, including that of ourselves. When we realize we are a part of this grand ecosystem of life, we can appreciate all the abundance in our lives and how the greater universe is in support of us.
How to Reflect Thoughtfully
Count your blessings by taking a moment of pause before your meals and acknowledging the nourishing food and company you keep.
Track your gratitude in a journal before going to bed or first thing in the morning.
Grow your faith and trust in yourself, humanity and the world by taking pause throughout your day to notice the beauty of nature around you and all the miracles it presents.
A wonderful quote, “nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished,” is a simple reminder of how we might live life with more meaning, peace and purpose by taking time to notice the tiny inspirations that exist everywhere.
This happens when we step outside our busy minds, and into the present moment and power of now.
Pause, look, what do you see?
Step 7. Train to Surf the Waves and find a Professional or Life Coach
We live in uncertain times and the waves of change do not stop. Surfing chaos is a practice and like every practice, a coach can be your sounding board, a coach has your back and a coach can help you get back on track.
During the pandemic, Coach Sarah E. Spencer observed how the entire global education sector was severely impacted, with thousands of professionals losing their jobs. She came to terms with this unexpected challenge by redirecting her time and energy to the Global Leadership League, an organization she founded to support newly unemployed leaders.
Coach Mueller Ihrig feels she has come to terms with the fact that life changes on a dime.
She says, “The best way to navigate changes in the tides of life is to learn to grow along with it by following our interests, intuition and raising our awareness by being more present in the moment. By being more present we quickly become aware of what is working and what we’d like to change. We can then decide to change our perspective about situations which we cannot change and find joy and opportunity in the now. This is my practice and I am so grateful as a coach to be able to help others walking their own paths.”
You can become successful at surfing chaos in life and the world!
Whether you are looking to improve your health and wellness, working on relationships or looking to advance your career and fulfill your dreams, you will find an MMSNorCal coach who is committed to being by your side.
Muriel Murphy is a Lifestyle, Health and Wellness Coach, a Yoga Educator/Functional Movement Specialist, and an Advanced Bodywork/Massage Practitioner. She sincerely believes the lineage of all healing arts is a gift of health and wellbeing for anyone who chooses to take the journey within. Muriel is an E-RYT 500 Yoga Educator (Yoga Alliance), MMS NorCal Certificated Coach, and a member of the MMS NorCal Coaching Collective.
Continuing the conversation on how you can surf chaos in the world and your life with grace and equanimity. In this next article in this three-part series, we present techniques and tactics to calm your mind plus how doing will make you feel better.
The MMSNorCal Collective coaches have been actively practicing techniques and also sharing them with their clients — here we benefit from their knowledge and experience. I encourage you to share this series of articles with friends and family so they too can benefit from them.
Step 3. Calm the Mind, Tap into Clarity and Creativity
The air waves full of doom and gloom; social media exposing us to an endless stream of rants and raves, and fear is infectious. We all affected by the collective upsetedness.
Coach Michelle Hayden-Marsan also limits the amount of news she exposes herself to and says that “I enjoy the freedom to listen and watch programming which serves me, and eliminate that which is negative.
I endeavor not to control or get aggravated by opinions which I personally do not ascribe to, although that can be challenging these days.
It is important for me to hold onto the values that I believe in and also to make an effort to not hold it against others who do not share my values. This can be tricky.
If I find myself getting anxious over the strongly held opinions of others, then I unfollow so I don’t have to judge or get my shackles up. Letting go of the need to be right is liberating.”
Mindfulness Around Negative News and Negative People
“You can’t hide from negative news or negative people,” says Coach Lindsey Taylor-Vivier, but you can be mindful about how you let it penetrate you. When I am around someone who focuses on the negative, I try to bring it to their attention, for many people it’s just a bad habit and they don’t even recognize that they are doing it.”
“I love following the international and domestic news, and seek diverse sources of information to access different voices and opinions”, shares Coach Sarah E. Spencer. “That said, the last few years have been more challenging. I have been somewhat successful by continuing to identify common ground, and engaging with deep listening and asking questions. At times, I have to be ruthlessly intentional about checking the news only twice a day, and making sure I don’t doom scroll, especially in bed!”
Instead of getting distracted with the news, Coach Carla Morton focuses on her clients. “That gets me out of my own head and oddly enough, my clients don’t talk about the news either. They are focused on their jobs and being the best leaders they can be.”
Mantra – Acceptance of Changes
Here is the first mantra that Coach Muriel uses to create calm amidst the chaos. She repeats them each day and they help her center and ground her into accepting the present.
I am in full and complete acceptance of the changes that have happened, that are going to happen in the future and the changes that are taking place in my present situations.
Reflection and Journaling Can Help Surf Chaos in the World
Coach Hayden-Marsan gives herself time for reflection and journaling (wonderful resource on building a journaling practice). “I figure out the best plan and schedule for things that make me feel joyful and whole. Then I give myself time to adjust to the newness of it all and I am compassionate when I may fall short every once in a while. I find it helpful to have a coach guide me through some of the thinking needed for the planning and also to help keep me accountable along the way.”
“Creating space for calm is huge for focus, creativity, productivity and purpose,” says Coach Michelle Mueller Ihrig.
We live in a world where people are doing more and more, filling their schedules to resemble a rat race, with the belief system that this is how we achieve success or our goals. When in fact the opposite can be true. When we learn to calm our minds and do less, we become more aware. When we become aware, we notice the things that we would like to create more of in our lives and notice the things we would like to change. A racing mind lives in autopilot and reactionary mode. An aware and calm mind has the capacity to prioritize, discover what is meaningful and can enhance strengths and grow.
Three Tools to Support a Calm Mind
Coach Mueller Ihrig suggests the following tools that she has found personally extremely useful to support a calm mind:
Daily morning guided meditation. Meditation is proven to reduce stress, release balancing hormones and enhance our overall well-being.
The word Curious. When you notice your mind starting to race, become aware and envision yourself stepping out of the situation. Become Curious. Ask yourself, what is happening here? How do I feel? What does this situation teach me? What can I learn? How would I like to respond? Become Curious about life, and open up awe and inspiration.
Reduce multitasking as much as you can. Pick what you will do and focus your time on it. Become fully present and engaged with what you are doing. You will accomplish your task more effectively, productively feel much more satisfied with your contribution and how you spent your time. Focused engagement leads to both clarity and creativity.
Step 4. Do Your Part; No Matter What Happens, Only You Get to Decide
Once we practice acceptance – the only certainty in life is change, we may not always like what life serves up – and ground the body and calm the mind, we can then decide what we can and cannot do, what we want to do, what is our responsibility and what is not for us to do.
Reset Your Priorities
Coach Sarah’s priorities have changed in two ways.
She says that firstly, “I want to spend time with our elders, whenever and however I can. This can include a card, letter, call or seeking their advice.”
Her second priority is to invest as much in her local neighborhood and community as possible.
“I dream about the ways in which I can personally expand, in spite of all of this”, says Coach Carla.
She adds, “I’m looking at getting involved in a more impactful way, with organizations that are doing-good in the world.”
As a result of feeling physically unsettled due to all the chaos in the world, she has committed to taking dance lessons again as she misses the challenge of choreography and learning new ways to move.
Coach Carla feels that we must uncover and discover creative ways (blog post on how to build a creative practice) to find joy all around us.
The pandemic has given many of us the time and space to reassess life and reevaluate our relationship with work.
“My priorities have become more clear and any decisions I was on the fence about before the pandemic became crystal clear,” says Coach Mueller Ihrig. “I wanted to be closer to my family, move on to the next professional chapter of my life, enjoy nature more, and be a mindful force for good in the world. I did just that, plus took time to slow down a bit. Slowing down has been the biggest gift of the pandemic.”
Become Intentional in Your Life
Coach Charles Vivier is “being more intentional in how I live and spend my life. Deepening relationships with friends and family. Focusing on the positive, being in the present and committed to the best plans for the future.”
“I want to spend time with the people I love,” says Coach Lindsey. “Luckily when the pandemic hit, I got stuck in St. Louis, where most of my family is. My husband was in France when the borders were about to be closed and got back just in time. We got to live day-to-day with my kids and grandkids and had the opportunity to strengthen my relationship with my sister. When we couldn’t fly home, we drove across the country, which was a great reminder of how beautiful America is.”
“The pandemic has really made me aware of our physical and mental vulnerability”, says Coach Marsan. “I feel the importance of living life to the fullest and doing what I love, now. I’m not “waiting” for the perfect time to have adventures and see the people I love. Instead, I make a list of what I want to do this year and next; who I want to reconnect with, and I create the plan to do so.”
Mantra to Release Energy
Coach Muriel shares a mantra she uses to create calm amidst the chaos in the world.
Here is how you can use it:
Repeat it each day
Write it on a sticky note
Place it on your desk montior where you can glance at it several times during day
The purpose of this mantra is the same as the one presented earlier in this article: to help you center and ground yourself into accepting the present.
On all levels of my being, may I release and let go of any and all energies that are no longer serving the growth and evolution of my higher self. May I forgive myself and everyone for everything, now and forever.
Mantra to Release Energy
In the final article in this series (Surf Chaos in Your Life and the World Part 3), you will learn how to breathe and embrace each new wave of change, build trust that all will be well, and train to surf the chaos in the world!
Michelle Mueller Ihrig is an Operations Leader, a Professional and Teams Coach, Consultant and Facilitator. Her philosophy of Leadership with Heart empowers leaders to embrace authenticity and connectivity to create stronger impact. Michelle’s Executive Wellness Coaching program is based on NLP (neuro linguistic programming) for growth mindsets and perspective shifts, Breatheology, and Mindfulness practices.
This website uses cookies so that we can provide you with the best user experience possible. Cookie information is stored in your browser and performs functions such as recognising you when you return to our website and helping our team to understand which sections of the website you find most interesting and useful.
Strictly Necessary Cookies
Strictly Necessary Cookie should be enabled at all times so that we can save your preferences for cookie settings.
If you disable this cookie, we will not be able to save your preferences. This means that every time you visit this website you will need to enable or disable cookies again.
